11 Reasons You Weren’t Selected in the NFL Draft
The NFL Draft is ancient history now and if you didn’t hear your name called, then we have bad news for you — it’s back to your cubicle where your dream of being a star on the gridiron will remain just that.
Of course, most people don’t make the cut. And while there may not be an “I” in “team,” but there is one in “quit.” So, if you’re wondering why every NFL team passed on you at the draft, consider these explanations:
1. You set a high school record for most injuries sustained during coin tosses.
2. Your coach has to constantly remind you that you are allowed to touch the ball with your hands.
3. The towel manager has racked up more passes to wide receivers on the field than you.
4. The only time you put something up on the scoreboard is when that linebacker hit you so hard that your helmet flew off and was embedded in the the “Home” sign.
5. The NFL doesn’t draft players to wear mascot costumes.
6. Drug tests aren’t graded on a curve.
7. You get winded changing the channel on your TV with the remote.
8. You continue to boast favorite NFL player of all time is Albert Pujols.
9. Your drinking and partying got so out of hand that you had to have an intervention organized by Ben Roethlisberger, Lawrence Taylor and the 2005 offensive line for the Minnesota Vikings.
10. You were suspended for a season for trying to snort the lines on the field.
11. The only trophy you ever won was for being the ‘Wing Eating Champion’ at your local Hooters.