Chris Illuminati
Man in Gumby Suit Tries to Rob 7-11 (But Doesn’t End Up in the Pokey) [VIDEO]
A man dressed as Gumby made such a horrible attempt at robbing a 7-11 store that the clerk thought it was all a joke. The assailant told the clerk he was being robbed then fumbled inside his costume as if he was going to pull out a gun. He ended up dropping 27 cents on the floor and being told by the man behind the counter “not to waste his time.”
2011 NFL Season – Week One Preview
What a long, strange trip it’s been this NFL offseason. It seems like only yesterday the news was filled with talk of a lockout and threats of a fall and winter without football. It’s now all in the past with nothing left to worry about but the fate of your favorite team.
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Justin Bieber Embarrasses NBA Star Steve Nash [VIDEO]
Justin Bieber is apparently good at basketball. So good, he not only has a killer crossover, but can get future NBA Hall of Famer Steve Nash to fall for it. But who would ever belieb … sorry … believe that kind of story?
A Shaved Alpaca Licking a Kitten Defines Adorable [VIDEO]
It’s impossible to not find kittens super adorable. Even alpacas are impervious to their cuteness. This alpaca wants to show its affection for this little bundle of fur by nudging it around with its nose and possibly asking it out on a date.
‘American Reunion’ Teaser Trailer – ‘American Pie’ Gang Is Older, But No Wiser, in New Sequel [VIDEO]
Who says you can’t go home? Not Stifler, his mom, Jim, Finch, Oz, Jim’s dad and the rest of the ‘American Pie’ crew, who are back for ‘American Reunion,’ supposedly the final film in the ‘Pie’ franchise after three theatrical releases and four direct-to-DVD spinoffs.
The film’s first teaser trailer dropped today and it doesn’t reveal much — just a collection of photobooth shots of the gang reunit
Unemployed Man Finds $150K in Vegetable Garden
Here is how the cheesy late-90′s stand-up comic buried deep in our subconscious would report this story:
“Hey folks! Did you read the story in the Northwest Herald today about a guy in Illinois that found $150K in his backyard garden? Talk about growing some cabbage! Am I right folks? Those are a different kind of greens my friends! You hear what I’m saying everyone?!?”
2011 NCAA College Football Week One Preview
After the worst off-season ever for college football, we’d like to say it feels good to get back to a sense of normalcy with some actual games. Unfortunately, the off-season woes will continue to dominate the headlines in Week 1.
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Spider-Man Endures Hurricane Irene [VIDEO]
Despite the country’s diligent precautions, Hurricane Irene left a path of destruction in her wake. It was enough to even scare Spider-Man, who sounded a little intimidated by Irene during this interview with a local ABC reporter. Even superheroes need to evacuate sometimes.
Squirrel Rushes the Field at Women’s Soccer Game [VIDEO]
A squirrel ran onto the field at a women’s soccer match this weekend in what was either an attempt to either make the team or ask one of the women out on a date. If it’s the former, he didn’t help his cause by running around in circles and then laying down. If it was the latter, well he was darn adorable, so one of the ladies might say yes.
Cat Against Dog in a Winner-Take-All Stare-Down [VIDEO]
It’s a classic stare-down: cat stares at dog, dog stares at cat and viewer stares at screen wondering what the heck is taking them so long. Come on fellas! Out of your respective corners and let’s get this fight going.
Cat versus dog. Who you got?
The Spaghetti Fork Makes Getting Fat Even Easier [VIDEO]
Inventor Bob Balow understands that common folk don’t want a man of his superior genius working on cures for cancer or a way to get ‘Dharma & Greg’ back on television. Sure, those would be nice, but what the people really demand is an easier way to shovel food into their mouth. Bob Balow is a man of the people and those people yearn for the Spaghetti-Pasta-Noodle Fork.