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The Midnight Writer

The Midnight Writer is a freelance writer and contributor to popular websites and magazines. He's written three humor books and often writes while under the influence. Under the influence of what, he will not say.
Courtney Lenz Baltimore Ravens
Larry French/Getty Images
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Courtney Lenz, Baltimore Ravens Cheerleader, Claims She Wasn’t Included on Super Bowl Trip Because of Weight

Courtney Lenz, a five year veteran of the Baltimore Ravens cheerleading squad, is claiming the team left her off the trip to the Super Bowl because of her "slight weight gain." Oh deer! Sorry, I meant dear. Force of habit with this squad.

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Category: Abilene News, Sports
Upclose Photo of Nose Hairs
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Here is Why I Can’t Wait To Stop Trimming My Nose Hairs [Half a Man]

It was, by far, the largest clump of nose hair thine eyes had seen in the flesh. A county fair worthy thatch of hair protruding out the left nostril, like weeds who had found a small sidewalk crack out of which to flourish. It was mesmerizing, snow white, and honestly I couldn't stop since he boarded the train.

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Category: Uncategorized
Sam Gordon Girl Football Player
YouTube
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Sam Gordon, 9-Year-Old Female Football Phenom, Invited to Super Bowl

Remember Sam Gordon, the 9-year-old female version of Tecmo Bo Jackson? So does NFL commissioner Roger Goodell. Her Pee Wee football highlight reel and gaudy season stats got the attention of NFL executives. She was invited to the Super Bowl in New Orleans after hanging out with Goodell at a Giants game.

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Category: Sports, Videos

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