Contact Us
Make My Homepage

Meet the Man with Over 600 Cabbage Patch Kids

knowlton cabbage patch

To Dan Knowlton, his Cabbage Patch Kids are his children. “They’re easier to cope with.” True — they never grow or die or have to maintain necessary life functions, but that doesn’t mean you need 600 of them. 

Knowlton lives in an apartment in Southampton, England, and is a part-time catering manager. We assume he spends most of the rest of his time cleaning up after his dolls. Even if they are less of a hassle than real children, once you get over 600 of something (he stopped counting five years ago when he reached that number), that’s a lot of dusting and cleaning and changing to do.

It sort of makes sense for somebody to relate so strongly to their Cabbage Patch Kid; after all, they aren’t made — they’re born. Each one is birthed by Mother Cabbage underneath the Magic Crystal Tree at Babyland General Hospital in Georgia. And there are “nurses” who deliver them from a hill covered in cabbages with doll’s heads growing out of them in front of crowds of spectators. We can only wish we made this up:

Then you get to walk around a room full of cribs and pick which baby you adopt. Yeah, so it’s a little bit different (read: crazier) than your average toy, but still doesn’t explain this:

Cabbage Patch Collection

Shudder. They’re…staring…right…into…our…soul.

Best of 1280 KSLI

Recommended For You

Best of the Web

Leave a Comment

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing VIP profile. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to using your original account information.

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

(Forgot your password?)

Not a member? Sign up here

Sign up for KSLI Country Club quickly by connecting your Facebook account. It's just as secure and no password to remember!

Sign up to have exclusive KSLI Country Club contests, events, coupons, presales, and much more delivered to you for FREE.