The ‘Baco’ Bacon Shell Taco Will Either Make Baseball More Enjoyable Or Kill You
The action on the field may not be the only heart-stopping thing fans of the West Michigan Whitecaps see this season.
The Detroit Tigers’ minor league team has announced the newest culinary delight fans can enjoy during games: "The Baco". As its name indicates, the Baco is a taco with a shell made entirely out of bacon, because, as we all know, everything is better with bacon. Just ask any pig.
The Baco sounds delicious, and it's sure to put you on the fast track to being a first ballot High Cholesterol Hall of Famer. It provides a nice basis for comparison with the Doritos Locos Taco. You probably won't be able to root, root, root for the home team after you eat it because your arm will have gone numb from the stroke you didn't realize you had while racking up a sodium intake that reads like a pinball score, but that's just a minor detail.
The Baco won first prize in a contest where fans submitted more than 150 dishes for consideration. The list was trimmed to 10 items before the public voted for their favorite. Coming in second place was the "Bad Joke" – a corn dog smothered in cheese and two strips of duck bacon that features so many animal parts PETA should protest it.
The Baco may be a hit, but it’s hard to imagine it will become a staple at any stadium, for two simple reasons: One, the people who will champion such a cause will most likely die from heart disease. Two, the phrase is “buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack,” not “buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack and a novelty Mexican food that will cause my angioplasty.” That just doesn’t roll off the tongue very well, does it?